The Actor's Nighmare

I've been having actor's nightmares a LOT lately, but last night's took the cake.

I was in a show with all women, strong actresses, all, and none of us seemed to have a firm grasp on the lines; what order they were coming in, what they were, or anything else having to do with the words coming out of our mouths. There was no blocking to speak of, I wasn't wearing stage makeup, so at one point, I was trying to do that onstage, in and around trying to remember my lines. Other actresses got injured onstage and at one point i had to help carry one of them to center. I actually got bored at one point and broke character to ask another actress on stage a question, and people in the audience answered; evidently the theatre had great acoustics, or I wasn't whispering like I thought I was. The worst part? The audience left and the house lights came on BEFORE WE FINISHED THE PLAY.

Humiliating.

I wonder what all that means? I'm not even auditioning for anything right now.

"Newton-John, you’re dead to me."

&hearts Go HERE and read obrien_blue's recap of the Glee finale. She does fabulous Bones recaps (or squee!caps) and this is the first one she's done for Glee. She's funny and smart and a hell of a writer (warning for language). I always laugh aloud at her entries. Go read. You won't be disappointed.

&hearts If I were in charge of the world, like a High Empress Over All Things, there would be a few changes. Manipulative people? Incarcerated for life. Mean people who insist of ranting about insignificant things and belittling others? Mmmm... the rack, I think. I'd be just and fair. And the bastards of life would need to re-think their positions on being jerks.

&hearts I've been feeling crappy lately. Like a low-grade nausea and intense tiredness. If I didn't know better (and I mean really know better), I'd say I was pregnant. And LHM, if I was pregnant, it would be a baby that would have a purpose, because it would be a freaking miracle. That is, if I didn't jump off a bridge, first.

&hearts I've been trying to write, poking around at a few things, but I'm just not inspired. When the muse takes a vacation, she really hits the road. I have no idea what to write that might spark any sort of even mildly acceptable results. It's sad.

&hearts We leave for Dallas on Friday, and we'll be gone for a week; the boys are going to a golf and tennis camp, and my sister will be there for the weekend. I want to get together with some old friends and family (I'm looking at you, deedsk_tx and tadpole_bac) and I think it'll be good to get away for awhile. When I get back, Nolan and I are going to the theatre's awards gala. I've been nominated for best actress, an award I fully do not expect to win. There are too many other great actors up for it, too. That's okay, there's a lot of that being nominated but not winning stuff going on. Luckily, my self esteem is high enough that it doesn't send me into a tailspin. Anyway, as I've been nominated, it's a great excuse to buy a dress. And I'm at -22 pounds, so shopping in the semi-formal departments in the Dallas area might even be pleasurable.

&hearts Nolan brought me 3 charms for my bracelet today for no reason whatsoever. That's nice, huh?

&hearts I love summertime. Seriously, having the boys home and going to the pool and making brownies and waking up whenever we feel like it? Nice. Really, really nice.

See you all on the flip side!