I'm Brain Dead

[persephone33]

&dagger Even though I'm diligent about sunscreen everywhere, for everyone, (Some people call me the sunscreen Nazi) I have a sunburn in the part of my hair. It really, really hurts. I think it blistered. Ouch. And gross.

&dagger I was sitting in the bathtub and going through the usual ablutions and noticed that my knees were dirty. I thought, "My knees are dirty? How the heck did that happen?" But then as I scrubbed, I found that they're just tan.

&dagger I don't think I look right with a tan. I just look dirty. You can't scrub away freckles, no matter how hard you try.

&dagger This bed seriously sucks. If we keep it much longer, I'm going to have to make an LJ tag for it. Something along the lines of, "This bed seriously frickin' sucks rocks."

&dagger There are three entities that I can hear snoring at present: Abbey (breathy whistle) Katie (rolling rumble) and Nolan Kyle (freight train).

&dagger I find I'm comforted by the sound of snoring. But not at all comforted by tan knees.

&dagger Nolan's 16 year old, completely adorable second cousin is staying with us for a visit. It makes me wonder if I was that completely adorable at 16.

&dagger I'd lay money on the fact that I wasn't. I'm pretty sure I was moody and self-centered and grouchy.

&dagger Evidently 16 isn't that far removed from 37.

&dagger There are 97 jars of homemade jam in my pantry right now. Peach, Strawberry Peach, Blueberry Peach, Balsamic Strawberry and Wild Plum.

&dagger I'd say I'm all jammed out, but I think I'm going to do a mixed berry. One more batch, then I'll stop.

&dagger Other people get hooked on crack, I get hooked on making jam.

&dagger I can't even get a habit without it being dorky.

&dagger Someone needs to make a rule that jam is still fruit. That way I can just have a spoonful for breakfast and it'll be on my diet.

&dagger I think diets blow.

&dagger But my big thighs blow more.

&dagger That's what she said.

&dagger Okay. Evidently the Advil PM has kicked in.

&dagger Have I said that Advil PM is really good stuff? It's a little blue pill. Not THAT little blue pill, but you know...

&dagger And can I just say how disgusting commercials are? I don't want to know about all the problems people need medicine for. Geez Louise! A little mystery would be nice.

&dagger Wonder if there's medicine you can take for dirty knees? Or a sunburnt part? Or a jam making habit?

&dagger If anyone knows, send along the information, please.

Now aren't you glad you read all that? Aren't you a better person for knowing it all?

No?

Well, at least you got to see my new layout. :) Goodnight.