You are as busy as you want to be.

After the last week of busyness - of performing and cooking and cleaning, and generally being more domestic than I've ever been EVER in my life, I found myself sitting on the couch last night, exhausted yet again. When a friend asked me how I was, innocuously enough, I started bemoaning the fact that I was tired, and that this is usually the time of year that I become Grinchy. A bad banana with a greasy black peel - the whole nine yards.

She wisely suggested that the level of Grinchiness is directly proportionate to the amount of work I have to do.

I thought that statement was profound. I've been thinking about it ever since.

She went on to say that if she "had to make her home perfect and be a perfect hostess and cook a perfect meal and buy perfect presents, etc., that she'd be a perfect raving bitch in short order."

I actually laughed out loud at that. But it was really an epiphany for me. Every year, I become beyond misanthropic, cranky and mean, all because I'm trying to create the perfect Christmas or holiday experience, and I really don't know where the drive came from to do it in the first place.

Christmas is not about stuff - buying and receiving gifts. And it's not about hospitality, or food, and it's not about how clean my house is for company. This particular upcoming season is to celebrate Jesus' birth, pure and simple. And I think that instead of putting my focus where it doesn't need to be, and making material things far more important than they need to be, I've been contributing to my own unhappiness. So this year, I'm going to make an effort to enjoy the season. To put my focus where it needs to be, instead of where it's been.

So yeah. Here's to the reason for the season. :)

And thanks for the perspective, Sharlene.