Try Not to Choke on the Drama

[persephone33]

I do not even know where to begin.

First, I was away from the fandom for 3 days, and I totally missed that book 7 is coming out in July.  All kinds of pleased about THAT.

I will say that I had a lovely time with Mom, Sister and Niece and Nephew.  Both kids are so cute I could scream.  Seriously.  When you're sitting with a two year old, watching her eat her lunch, and you say, "Yum!  I LOVE carrots!"  and she looks at you with big blue eyes and says joyfully, "ME, too!" like it's so cool that you have something in common with her...  AH!  I just want to bundle her up and bring her home.  That, and the fact that she has a serious Dora the Explorer addiction.  7 month-old nephew is nine kinds of adorable, as well.  He doesn't say much, but you can tell that he's very, very wise.

I managed to go shopping while I was there, and got some bowls for the kitchen, a new purse, a teapot, some tea infusers, and candy for the boys and Hubby.  Also got hubby valentine boxer shorts for the upcoming holiday, although I might give them to him sooner, he's having surgery today, poor lamb.

So here's what happened.  I'm late.  I mean, late, late.    I went to the grocery store for my mother on Wednesday afternoon and while I was there, on a whim, I picked up a prgnancy test.  (They've improved those in the last 5 years, BTW.  Absolutely foolproof, right?  No more positive, negative, plusses or minuses, but the actual words, Pregnant or Not Pregnant. 

Imagine my dismay, shock and nausea when that little window popped up with the word Pregnant.  I think I might've blacked out for a moment, then went completely emo for about 5 hours.  Cried.  I mean, my husband is having a vasectomy later in the week and I might be pregnant.  Ironic, no?  I have an almost 5 YEAR OLD.  We've been out of diapers for YEARS.  We have NO baby stuff.  It has long since been sold, given away, or burned in a pyre.  I'm not a good enough mother to have 3 kids!  I'm a terrible pregnant person! I was going to go back to work!  I was going to write full time!  I was going to ressurrect my acting career!  I had just lost down to 132!  Hubby's snip snip appontment is in two bleeding days!  Damn, damn, double damn.  Called hubby.  He, of course was overjoyed, which added to my guilt.  He called me 3 more times in the next hour to see if I was okay, and if he could do anything for me.  Being six hours from home, I said, "No."  Other than the fact that you could have bloody well kept your first vasectomy appointment instead of WAITING FOR HUNTING SEASON TO BE OVER, YOU WANKER.

Those tests are foolproof, right?  I took another one.  Foolproof my ASS.  The second one was inconclusive.  OOOOKAY...  are you telling me that I PEED ON THE STICK WRONG?  If I could've choked that little test stick, I would've.  Later that night, I went back to the grocery store and bought some more tests.  The pharmacist gave me the eye, and the man standing and waiting for his prescription was smirking at me, but at that point, I didn't care.  Judge all you want, people.  Persephone needs a little peace of mind!  I got home, took the third test...  and the sweetest little words ever popped up in the window.  Not Pregnant.  I squeed louder than I've ever squeed before, I think.  Called hubby.  He sounded sad.  More guilt.  A litttle overshadowed by joy, but still there.

I didn't take a test at all yesterday, but this morning the first thing I did was to take the fourth and final, and that one was Not Pregnant, as well.  Just to make sure, however, I went and had blood drawn and made an appointment with a new OB-GYN, as mine is a complete and total ass.  So.  I feel pretty confident in the fact that I, in fact, am NOT with child, but I should know for sure later this afternoon.  Or maybe Monday.  Why is it that everytime you need information from a doctor it's a holiday or the weekend?

The weather can bite me, as well.  It snowed last night.  Again.  It snowed while I was in Dallas.  It snowed on my 6 hour drive home yesterday.  I LIVE IN TEXAS!  Where's the heat?

Okay.  All done.  Everyone have a lovely weekend.

Comments

[humbuggirl.livejournal.com]

Ooh I love your icon!

[persephone33.livejournal.com]

Grosse Pointe Blank is one of my favorite movies!

Plus, I felt like shooting someone the other day....

[peki.livejournal.com]

Omg! What an emotional rollercoaster. While I think it's great that half or so of my flist is pregnant right now (vicariously living through other people *g*) I hope you'll get the result you're hoping for! *holds thumbs*

[persephone33.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I hope I get the results I'm hoping for, as well. I'm all for babies and other people having them, just not me, and not right now.

[13oct.livejournal.com]

*Hugs* if anyone can relate to what you just went thru, it's me. You poor thing... hope you get the results that you want.

*leaves behind a tub of ice cream AND chocolate* if there ever was a time to indulge it's now!

[persephone33.livejournal.com]

Fank oo.

*swallows chocolate*

Stupid Doctor's office closes at noon on Friday (of course) and didn't call with my results before they closed.

*tries not to have anuerism*

[13oct.livejournal.com]

If it's of any use, getting three 'Not Pregnant' results is pretty good. Hope everything works out fine... and that ur not pregnant.

All the best for the weekend. What are u planning to do to kill time?

[persephone33.livejournal.com]

Well, Hubs had a vasectomy today, so I'll likely be acquiescing to his every whim, once he wakes up from all the drugs. That, and of course giving myself an ulcer by worrying. You know, the usual!

[embe11ished.livejournal.com]

It must be super annoying to have to wait all weekend to find out the results. Good luck with it!

[persephone33.livejournal.com]

SUPER annoying. Yeah.

[seegrim.livejournal.com]

It sounds like you've been on one heck of an emotional roller coaster. I hope it all turns out well!

[persephone33.livejournal.com]

Thanks!
*crosses fingers*

[fallenwitch.livejournal.com]

Sorry, I freaking choked on the drama and am now turning blue. *falls over from empathic asphyxiation*

[fallenwitch.livejournal.com]

Revives and reads post again to make sure I didn't have a nightmare. *begins coughing and gasping for air* Sending out all the "not pregnant, not pregnant" vibes I can muster. *passes out again*

[persephone33.livejournal.com]

*collects not pregnant, not pregnant vibes*

Thanks. So sorry about you choking on the drama... I'm sure we'll be back to fluffy bunnies and rainbows before too long!

[dragonsangel68.livejournal.com]

Oh my *hugs you* I hope the results come back strongly in favor of what you'd prefer.

[persephone33.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I'd prefer to NOT be pregnant. That's the plan, anyway. Actually, I'd prefer to be on a beach somewhere with an umbrella drink... but you know what they say... prefer in one hand...

Wait. I don't think they say that. :)

[kristibisci.livejournal.com]

Yeesh! That must have been all kinds of stressful! I can't even imagine. I do like the irony, though. Very movie-ish. ;) But I understand the predicament you're in. Again, yikes! Good luck at the OB-GYN!

[persephone33.livejournal.com]

I DOES sound movie-ish, doesn't it?

Sadly, every bit of it is true. :)