persephone33

"Sometimes it's difficult to be alive, you know? Just to try to function.  There are all these people to deal with.  I used to find it difficult to leave the house because of them.  People, I mean."   - Laughing Wild, by Christopher Durang

That line's been running through my head on a loop for the last week. It was from a monologue cutting I did for a scholarship audition, years ago.  It's funny how these thing com back at weird times.

Random thoughts:

*My attention to detail is not good.  This used to bother me, but it simply does not anymore.  If you have to fix my mistakes, try to do so without making me feel stupid.  Or talking to me about it at all.  And I'll do the same for you.

*Conflict cripples me.  I cannot function in the midst of a fight.  My instinct is to withdraw.  The fact that I say nothing does not mean that I agree or disagree, for that matter.

*Because I choose to be silent does not, in fact, make me weak.  I think to refrain from speaking is one of the hardest things in the world to do.

*I love Lego Star Wars with every fiber of my being.  That game has united my children, forcing them to WORK TOGETHER.  The planets must've aligned just right.  I don't understand why Indiana Jones shows up, but I love it all the same.

*blueberry muffins soothe a lot of pain.

*I'm grateful for friends.

*one of my favorite things is going for a walk with my dog.  She's so excited.  And joyful while we're out.  And grateful.  Of course, she's grateful to get back on the couch when we get back, as well.

*I love writing.  I'd become disillusioned with it in the past three years or so, but my love for it is back.  I'm inspired.  So YAY.

* And because I can, and really enjoyed this the last time I did it::

For the first five people that reply to me and re-post this challenge, I will send you something. It might be something I've made, or something cool from my hidden stash, it might be a mix CD, or a rubber duck, a book I think you will enjoy, or something else that is awesome. Whatever it is, I promise that I will get it to you in 30 days or fewer. (Or as long as it takes.:)) The only thing you need to do in order to participate is to be one of the first five to reply to this, AND post this very same thing on YOUR LiveJournal - cause it's fun to give people stuff. (Please read all the comments because I'll be replying to people, and this will make my comment numbers jump up.)  

If I don't already have your address, (and why not?  I'm not a stalker!) you can send it to persephone3333@gmail.com.  :)

So I pride myself on being a professional actress.  I work for a very professional theatre.  They do things right, for the most part, they don't cut corners, have and have real artists that do the sets, costumes, etc.  Professional pride.

God.  You know what pride comes before, right, Carrie?

Carrie.  (raises hand)  A fall?

God.  Correct, Carrie.  5 points to Slytherin.  (Is God somehow Professor Snape in this scenario?  I hope not.)

I have always memorized my lines and tried not to bump into the furniture (sage words of wisdom from Dennis Maher).  I always stay in character while onstage.  It's the professional thing to do.  I've looked down my nose and huffed at actors that didn't.  Last night, it all went to hell.  The professionalism...  the not bumping into the furniture...  

When an actor gets tickled (laughs, giggles) on stage, and can't control it, it's called "corpsing."  I dunno why, It's one of those things I vaguely remember from college.  It had never happened to me, not till last night.

Here's the way the dialogue went.

****

(Felix and Cecily and Gwendolyn (me) have just been having a good cry; Oscar has come back into the room and is disgusted with Felix for screwing up his date)

Oscar.  (to Felix) I can't leave you alone for 5 seconds.  Well if you really want to cry, go look at your London Broil.

Felix.  (rushes madly into the kitchen)  Oh, my gosh!  Why didn't you call me?  I told you to call me!

Oscar.  I'm sorry girls, I forgot to warn you about Felix.  He's a walking Soap Opera.

(from the kitchen, we hear the loudest, girliest shriek imaginable - think Nathan Lane from "The Birdcage.")

Gwendolyn.  I think he's the dearest thing I ever met.

****

Only I can't say that last line, because I'm having to turn upstage and put my drink in front of my face to keep the director from seeing me laugh.  It was a good 15 or 20 seconds before I could get it together to deliver the line.  It's a good thing we're a week and a half out from preview night.  Maybe it won't be as funny to me then.

I seriously doubt it.  It's freaking hysterical.

Then, in the second scene, I bumped into the occasional table by the chair. THAT HAS BEEN THERE SINCE DAY ONE.  Not only did I do that, I also broke character by letting out a mild swear moderately loudly.  So, all in all, not my finest hour as an actress.  Ah, how the mighty have fallen.

On an altogether different note...  why do parents lose their damn minds when driving while dropping their kids off for school?  Does anyone know?